Epiphany!!!

What a difference! The three kings had only a rumor to go by. But it moved them to make that long journey. The scribes were much better informed, much better versed. They sat and studied the Scriptures like so many dons, but it did not make them move. Who had the more truth? The three kings who followed a rumor, or the scribes who remained sitting with all their knowledge?

Source: Soren Kierkegaard, Only Rumor

Lenten Prayer

Beautiful and idealistic - a prayer from my heart - not because I am here, but I long to be:

We have chosen to fast

Not with ashes but with actions

Not with sackcloth but in sharing

Not in thoughts but in deeds

We will give up our abundance

To share our food with the hungry

We will give up our comfort

To provide homes for the destitute

We will give up our fashions

To see the naked clothed

We will share where others hoard

We will free where others oppress

We will heal where others harm

Then God's light will break out on us

God's healing will quickly appear

God will guide us always

God's righteousness will go before us

We will find our joy in the Lord

We will be like a well watered garden

We will be called repairers of broken walls

Together we will feast at God's banquet table

Christine Sine - via BeliefNet

Happy New Decade!

And now, we welcome the new year,
full of things that have never been.

Ranier Maria Rilke

Free the Bumble!!

Just got invited by my friend on Facebook, Chris Coyle, to correct one of the greatest injustices of our generation - please read on to join our cause:

After seeing a show aimed at children in which a noble creature was taunted, baited, captured, tortured, maimed and mutilated and then used for slave labor and entertainment my daughters turned to me, horrified. I promised to do something, and I'm asking for your help.

A beautiful white ape-like creature with eerily human features and expressions once lived off in the wild frozen tundra of the polar region keeping a respectful distance from the nearest man. His icy eden was spoiled by a crazed capitalist prospector known as Yukon Cornelius who was determined to strip the area of its resources, be they gold, silver or peppermint.

Wary of outsiders following his encounters with Yukon, the gentle giant was understandably curious and terrified by a subsequent invasion by a sadistic elf accompanied by a sweet but confused reindeer. The reindeer was afflicted with a bright and shining nose. The presence of these two triggered our polar ape to give vocal warning and to follow them out to the perimeter of his territory along with the cunning Yukon.

A brief aside about the elf in question in case you doubt his character: some defect in his nature caused him to reject a life of bringing joy to children and to instead secretly delve into a fascination with inflicting pain on mankind of all ages.

After leaving the Yeti's stomping grounds the group went on to join a gang known as the Misfits who lived in colony much like Major Kurtz's. (editorial comment: have to admit, a gang led by a flying lion wearing a crown would be tempting. Moonracer, you are the coolest).

Conflicted about his 'friends' the reindeer returns to his turf, er, tundra but finds that his herd has strayed into the Yeti's domain. A natural prey of the beast, this was a foolish choice. At this point the story takes an ugly turn. Rather than allowing the Circle of Life, the the prospector and Hermey the creepy elf take advantage of the moment to bait the bumble into an ambush. Not content with rescuing the should-be meal, the twisted little Hermey pulls every tooth from the animals head and then he and Yukon mock the poor animal before attempting to push him to his death off a cliff.

In his attempt to kill the now harmless creature (who, having had his teeth pulled, unfortunately completely forgot about his fierce claws and his ability to deliver crushing eye-rolling blows using ice stalactites as a club) the penurious prospector also went over the edge.

As we find out later, the mutilated and humiliated so-called 'abominable' uses his own body to save his tormentor's life.

How is the benign benevolent Bumble rewarded for self-sacrificial act? Slavery. In one of the most blatant shockingly imperialistic quotes of the show, the treatment of the bumble is explained away as "I've reformed this bumble. He wants a job." Sick. Colonialism much? Maybe he wants his land, his teeth and his freedom!?!

I don't know what we can do but at least now you're aware.

Join Our Cause

(Thank you Chris - you have definitely missed your calling - OpEd for the Tribune is in your future!

Epiphany

 Today is the Feast of the Epiphany and also the third anniversary of our arrival in New Brunswick.

A few months after our arrival we found out that the New Brunswick motto is "Spem Reduxit" - literally "Hope was restored" - it is so true to our story. Epiphany comes in so many ways.

May you find one today.

(I took this picture at St. Saviour's church in Bar Harbor, Maine - I don't know if it is one of the Tiffany stained glass or not, it is very beautiful though)

Slow, permanent change

While journalling last night I caught myself starting to feel the pressure of the New Year begun (it was after 1:00 a.m. when I was writing). I quickly caught that random thought and realized that today was no different than yesterday. Just because of a calendar flip I was programmed to play some very old tapes in my head.

As I felt the anxiety this brought I remembered that each and every new day is a calendar flip for me. One day at a time really means something to me. Recovery has taught me that slow, permanent change is far more meaningful in my life than resolutions and promises that fit into once a year commitments.

I do enjoy the fresh feeling that the New Year brings and I celebrate it joyfully - but I am doing nothing different today than I was yesterday - other than focusing on my word for this year - THRIVE.

I had some conversations today along this same line. As I processed this verbally I realized that the mindset resolutions always tricked me into was that when broken I needed another BIG day to begin again. Treating each new day as a fresh opportunity for change has been so healing for me. Today is all I have been given. I awoke to this in my inbox this morning:

I was regretting the past and fearing the future.
Suddenly my Lord was speaking: My name is I AM.
When you live in the past, with its mistakes and regrets, it is hard. I am not there.
My name is not I Was.
When you live in the future, with its problems and fears, it is hard. I am not there.
My name is not I Will Be.
When you live in this moment, it is not hard. I am here.
My name is I AM.

Helen Mallicoat

Source: Found in The Silence of Unknowing by Terence Grant

via

Merry Christmas from the Turners!

MMMMMMM.... Can you smell that? Our home is full of fragrance and warmth. Today's menu included Maple Sausage and Cranberry Bread French Toast for brunch. And on the dinner menu this evening we are offering Prime Rib, Coconut Shrimp, Baked Potatoes, Roasted Cauliflower and Splenda Coconut Chess Pie.

Hope your day is merry, merry! Wish you were here!

Merry Christmas from the Turners!

Send your own ElfYourself eCards

Story People Ornaments!!!!

Oh my, such joy - look at these beautiful works of art!

They just arrived in my inbox and I had to share them with you. This email came along to explain them:

We don't know about you, but now that the election is over, we can't wait for the world to be fun again. For a long while there, the only thing that came to mind was that we were a little like pinatas at a party of politicians & all of them had way too much sugar.

We thought it was just our problem, since we have a high fun requirement. Now it looks like a lot of people had the same trouble. But, just to be sure, we took a quick poll & here's the result: almost a hundred percent of everybody we talked to is looking at the pinata stuff on the floor & thinking it needs a whole lot of cleaning up, but at least we're finally going to do it together.

We think it's a perfect time to fire up some magic to send us on our way...

You know how magic works. You sit down, think gentle thoughts & ask the universe. Then you listen for the answers.

We didn't have long to wait.

Completely out of the blue, we got a call from Lynne Suprock. Who happens to be an artist from Pennsylvania & a maker of delicate & lovely jewelry. It seems that Lynne had been stirring a little of Brian's art work into her handmade jewelry. After watching her for a few months, her friend Carol just about stood over her until she gave us a call. She told us what she'd been cooking up - part StoryPeople print in miniature, part suncatcher, part jewelry & part holiday ornament. It was magic of the highest order...

We know that when you see them you'll be so delighted you'll most likely want to have your very own. (We know because that's just what happened to us when we saw them..)

Now, the only problem is that Lynne makes each one by hand, so she can get the balance of sparkle & light & magic just right.

So, we calculated how much sleep & personal time Lynne needs between now & the holidays in order to make all the ornaments you might want. We wrote it down on a tiny slip of paper & folded it & slid it across the table to her. She took one look & laughed & said she hasn't had that much free time since she was eight. So, we came up with a new plan. Lynne says you can order all the ornaments you want for the next three weeks & she promises she'll get them to you in time for the holidays. How's that for the universe being on your side?

If you're ready to let the magic back into your world, now's the time. You've got three weeks, so don't wait. (OK. Wait a minute. That's not completely true. We hope you know that you can let in magic any time you want. You only get three weeks for this particular bit of magic... :-)) These hand-made ornaments are available to order for the next three weeks (through Thankgiving Day, Nov. 27th to be precise), so get them while you can!

I <3 the StoryPeople. Wish Iowa was that cool when I lived there!

Place your order here: StoryPeople Ornaments

As far as I get

Back from a wonderful camping trip on the Maine coast with friend. This was the story I found in my inbox this morning and it fit perfectly today:

Thinking the sea is good for not thinking & for some reason,
this is as far as he gets

via Story People

Leaving on a jet plane...

This trip feels like God was our travel agent. It's a gift to be going to Oregon to be reuniting with my family. I am so excited. We are spending a couple of days in Portland, a week with my aunt near the California border and 5 days on the coast. I can't wait. Don't know if I'll have access to the internet while away, so I might not be back until the 20th. Be good to yourself today.

Lent: 2008

Scot McKnight just blogged an idea for lent that I think I am going to embrace. Saying the Jesus Creed as the first and last part of each day.

I will also be limiting my morning computer time. I'm not totally removing the computer from my life for Lent as I have papers to write and research, but I won't be sitting in front of the computer until after noon each day. Quick, standing reference or email excepted. The purpose of this to to encourage me to find better ways to spend my time - like reading for school... :P

Our family is also choosing "meatless Mondays" as a way to begin to examine our own "omnivore's dilemma" and begin to think more carefully about our consumption and learn to cut back in ways that help us and our planet.

The kids and Keith have decided to join me in my chocolate fast (nearly 8 years now) although I'm sure they will celebrate the Sunday release and enjoy some of their favorite treats.

I will also be attempting to explore yoga in the comfort of my own living room. I have a dvd that will get me started and if nothing else will give me some quiet, stretching and breathing time to center my day and get my blood flowing.

Lent has only been a part of my history for the past few years. I don't know if I'll be holding my own ash ceremony tomorrow or if I'll find a service here locally, but I appreciate it's addition to my yearly routine. It reminds me regularly that I am not alone in my faith as I join with the church in choosing these 40 days (actually 47?) to be different.

How will you be celebrating lent?

Epiphany

Tiffany Stained Glass taken in September at St. Saviour's Church, Bar Harbor, Maine - not for commercial use.

Yappy Hew Near!

From the StoryPeople:

Maybe I don't want a Happy New Year, he said.
Maybe I want an intense New Year
with a lot of growth experiences
& I had to admit I'd never thought of that.

Wishing you an intense year with a lot of growth experiences! :)

The Abomination of Decoration

Okay, it's a little after the season, but made me laugh out loud - thanks Mike, I needed that!

Have an Airy Christmas

New Years Resolutions

My bloggity friend, Penni, over at Martha, Martha picked at topic for the day. I started to comment on her blog, but it became a post and it began to ramble, so I'm answering it here:

are you one who makes resolutions?

Yes, but not in the traditional way. I love the routine that a year cycle brings - so I don't only use January 1st as a marker and make resolutions regularly - but never the kind that are legalistic - only those that are life giving.

do you write them down?

I journal about them throughout the year, blog on them and track them so that I can be encouraged by the changes that are happening in my heart and soul.

do you recheck them a week later (or a month or two) to see how you are faring?

It's not so much about "faring" for me - but as a reminder - kind of an "oh yeah - how is that folding into my life?" I'm kind of A.D.D. so I can loose the thread at times - rechecking helps me find it again.

are you looking forward to the next year?

Yes - I love the clean slate a new year brings. I also am marking the close of Step 10 "Continue to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it" Choosing to actively work this step I have introduced the daily examen each night and find it gives me much life. It has become ingrained into my routine now and love it. I will be starting Step 11 - "Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out." - in January and am excited to see what this brings to my life.

are you happy to see this one come to a close?

2007 was a big year for us - so many major life changes (without having to move!) - we started our Masters Degree, Jacob was diagnosed with Juvenile Diabetes and Alinea is loving French Immersion and Middle School. It wasn't always easy, but taking one day at a time we did it all together.

Last year I prayed for a word to focus on and I got "centered" - I used it throughout the year as a touchstone and am amazed at how much I have grown because of it.

My new word for this year came to me just the other day - complete - I don't know what it means yet, but I am looking forward to finding it weaving it's way into my life this year.

The waiting is over

All of these things have tied together for me today:

I wonder, if we were to stop people at random in the street on December 24 and ask them what they want most for Christmas, how many would say, 'I want to see Jesus'?

I believe that the single most important consideration during the sacred season of Advent is intensity of desire. Paraphrasing the late Rabbi Abraham Heschel, 'Jesus Christ is of no importance unless he is of supreme importance.' An intense inner desire is already the sign of his presence in our hearts.

Source: Brennan Manning, Lion and Lamb : the Relentless Tenderness of Jesus

Don't You Sense Me?

I am, you anxious one.

Don't you sense me, ready to break
into being at your touch?
My murmurings surround you like shadowy wings.
Can't you see me standing before you
cloaked in stillness?
Hasn't my longing ripened in you
from the beginning
as fruit ripens on a branch?

I am the dream you are dreaming.
When you want to awaken, I am that wanting.
I grow strong in the beauty you behold.
And with the silence of stars I enfold
your cities made by time.

Rainer Maria Rilke Book of Hours: Love Poems to God

via nakedpastor.com

Advent complete.

Angels we have heard on high

Tiffany Stained Glass window in St. Saviour's Church, Bar Harbor, Maine.
Not for commercial use.

Oh the glory of a good nights sleep

When I spoke with Jake's doctor last night she said some beautiful words "Since he's not going low in the middle of the night, let's cut out the 3:00 a.m. blood check." Music to my ears! I really would have done it for the rest of my life if necessary (she said we'd probably only have to do it for a couple of weeks) but the difference it made to be able to go to bed and not have to get up until morning was glorious.

I felt like a new woman.

We have an early communion/celtic liturgy service that I had been attending and so missed last week that was fuel for my soul this morning and then Joel did Cockburn's Mary Had a Baby for worship and it somehow felt like Christmas again.

So I guess I just needed a long cry, a good whine and a night's rest to have some sanity restored.

We also had a celebration dinner out last night. We went to the local steakhouse/pub across the river and had a sandwich (and I didn't have to cook). We celebrated Jake's health and Alinea's amazing report card (she's doing so well in French Immersion - we are so proud of her!) and just had a fun, giggly night out together. Life feels much more manageable on all fronts.

More like Easter than Christmas...

If it wasn't for all of the snow and two munchkins constantly reminding me about present lists and advent calendars I wouldn't really even know it was Christmas. It must be all of the needles, blood and exhaustion, but in my heart it feels a lot more like Lent than Advent right now.

This has become my life. Middle of the night blood tests and doing more math in two weeks than I do in a year. Constant thoughts of meal plans, supply lists and telephone calls to endocrinologists who should be more tired of this than I am but don't seem to be. The celebration of the holiday is just lost on me. We're supposed to get a tree this weekend, but I can't say that I even care. It seems like way more work than it's worth but maybe it can kick start me into the holiday season. I truly doubt it though.

Keith is sick and has pushed so hard to get the Activity Center ready for the grand opening yesterday. He doesn't have the resources right now either. Poor Alinea is getting the dregs and is showing the signs of all of this change too. The hardest part is that we don't have grandparents or any family to come in and save the day. It's not like we ever really have. We did two babies alone for their whole childhood. I should be used to this by now, but it just seems so real in the shadow cast by the "joy of Christmas". Having the energy to fake through this holiday to make others feel better right now just isn't possible.

I don't know how to get from Lent to Advent this year.